The moment when you try to put your child to bed. And you roll to the very edge of a super single bed to reply a text and not wake child up. And the child looks over and asks “why you so far away from?” Proceeds to hold your hand, before falling asleep.
Worth it.
2020 was tough. No doubt about it. Parenting in 2020 was tough. Work in 2020 was tough. Life in 2020 was tough.
But you know what ? While it was tough, we also had really good times. We spent 2 months quarantined at home with nothing but each other (and lotsa shows). We stayed healthy. All our family and friends stayed healthy. And by and large life in Singapore has gone 75% back to normal I would say.
Things I discovered in 2020.
1. Toy rentals. How I never knew about it. I don’t know. But we ended up renting a play structure for our balcony. And spent hours just sitting around the balcony passing time. It’s amazing. Highly recommend as a way to try new toys/to get age appropriate toys (because it doesn’t last long as we all know).
2. Educational games on the iPad. Aside from shows, I have found some educational games that J enjoys. Will share a list soon.
3. Bubble machine. We got a cheap automatic bubble blower off the internet for like $10. It takes lots of bubble solution (which was surprisingly hard to find during circuit breaker days) but you know what. My 3 year old spent an hour chasing bubbles everyday. Just running. So I highly recommend.
4. Online bookstores. Aside from book depository (which takes a while to deliver, particularly so during CB), many other stores started delivering online. We ended up buying almost a hundred books just to past the time. And I learnt that 3 year olds can do activity book and reference books for kids are a great way to teach topics.
5. Take time for yourself where you need to. I’m an introvert. I don’t like to talk all the time. I don’t feel the need for a lot of social interaction. My son on the other hand is very sociable and loves to talk. And when there are only the three of us at home. Clearly we’re going to need to entertain him. It nearly drove me nuts. I learnt to take breaks for myself. Even if it meant just sitting on the bath tub for half an hour. It just reset my energy and gave me more patience to deal. Mad props to my husband for being able to deal with the both of us during all the mess.
Maybe I’ll continue the list another time. But you know what. 2021 seems to be getting better. Things in Singapore have kinda stabilised. Vaccines are available. The global situation is…. Well. We’ll see. Hopefully some day soon we can take a plane somewhere and see the world again?
I spent last night yelling at J because he was yelling at me. That’s a simple summary of my night.
I love how there are soooo many books out that teach you about positive parenting. Positive discipling. Positive everything. And you know what. I really do try. To keep my calm. Keep my cool. And in general try to stick to more positive manners of bringing a child up.
But you know what. It’s difficult. For everyone who judges. Who vehemently disagrees with my way of parenting. I don’t profess to be perfect. Far from it. But the truth is. I’m just as temperamental as my child (clearly that’s where he got it from). It doesnt help that there are days where I might be busy, tired, hormonal. The list goes on. Not excuses, just facts of life.
I’m cool with the fact that I’m not a bad parent. I know J is a good kid. I know that in general, J is really well behaved. But do I feel like a bad parent nonetheless? Of cos. When I’m screaming at him, screaming at me. When I leave him to scream because we both need to calm down.
So what’s the point of this post? Honestly. Nothing. Just wanted to put it out there. That no one is perfect. Stop judging. We’re all trying. We’re all guilty without having our faults highlighted. offer help. Not judgement.
So. 2020 has been quite an experience. As most people are aware, the world is currently coming to terms with a global spread of the Covid-19 illness. On a professional level, we’ve been swamped dealing with it at work. On a personal level, we’ve been trying to manage a super active almost-3 year old. While trying to understand what risks are acceptable with regards to the virus.
When the virus first came to the fore, it was right around the Lunar New Year, sometime in end-jan. Unfortunately, we had already planned (and paid for) a holiday to Bangkok with my MIL in the second week of Feb. After watching the situation develop (in Asia), we made the decision to cancel our trip. We were very lucky that Singapore Airlines was willing to refund our plane tickets and we had a cancellation policy with the hotel. However, the almost-3 year old was solrely disappointed. He loves plane rides and holidays in general and till today still asks when we’re going to BKK.
As the situation worsened slightly in Singapore, with the declaration of DORSCON orange, we actually decided to avoid crowded places for a week or so. However, we still headed out for meals and regular shopping runs when needed. Extra precautions were taken to try and not allow the child to touch everything within his reach (any parent can attest to how difficult this is) and to constantly wash his hands. Hand sanitizer and antibacterial wipes supplemented the handwashing. Because at the rate he touches things. We couldn’t possibly being him to the washroom enough.
Now that things have calmed down a little (in Singapore at least. Globally things have escalated quite a bit), we’ve taken the decision to try and live life and normally as possible. We’ve brought him out to play areas, swimming every weekend. We’re looking to bring him rock climbing soon because that’s what he wants to do for his birthday. Disney on ice is coming to Singapore and we’ll be doing that.
I guess, everyone has a different level of comfort. But for us, it really is about risk management balanced with the need to allow J to expand his energy and spend as much quality time together (when we’re not working) as possible. J loves the outdoors, running, jumping and keeping him cooped up really didn’t seem to help anything.
It’s interesting to see how quickly he’s picked up on the fact that there is a virus going around and it makes people fairly sick. That vitamins keep people healthy. And handwashing is important. Never underestimate these little people. They are smarter and more cognizant of what is going around than we realise.
Morale of the story? There isn’t one. I hope everyone stays as safe and as happy as possible in this current climate. Cheers to a happier post next time.
J is now 2.5 yrs old. Who would have imagined, we’ve kept him alive all this while!
In one of my earlier posts, I mentioned that we upgraded our compact stroller to a bigger one. Let me elaborate. We had a compact Stroller, the Joie Pact Lite that we used on basically all our travels. We loved it. J slept (like a baby?) during his naps while we enjoyed some J-free time in the day. I know so many people who ask how we travel so well, and how come we didn’t mind bring J on all our holidays, to all these places. We’ve been hiking (clearly not with the stroller), to various theme parks (from Disney to Universal to Dreamworld) and all sorts of shopping with J on holidays.
But we realise on our last trip to the Gold Coast in July that J was simply getting too big for his stroller. J isn’t big by any account. But I would say he is above average height and size. While the Joie Pact Lite is meant for kids to 20 kg if I’m not mistaken. While J is no where near there, he was getting too long to sleep in the stroller comfortably. Even with the lie flat function, his legs were dangling and almost touching the floor.
So upon coming back, I made it a mission to fnid out if there were other compact stroller that might be bigger in dimension compared to the Joie Pact Lite, while not costing a fortune (we don’t use the stroller a lot anymore). Which is when we found the Joie Tourist.
The Joie Tourist is very similiar to theJoie Pact Lite except that it is slightly larger. I dont think the dimensions are as important as me telling you that it will likely not be able to fit in an overhead cabin. Unlike the Joie Pact Lite, which was a cabin sized stroller.
Also, it is longer. You can fold up the leg area to make it even longe. Perfect for naps. Its about 1kg heavier I think? But still comes with a strap that allows you to carry it easily on holidays.
Also, it has this easy fold function where you can fold it easily with one hand. Not very significant but still. A fun party trick.
I’ve yet the travel with it (only brought it on excursions to Jewel) but J has loved it so far. Will update further after Nov when we’re headed to Japan with the stroller.
Cheers.
Why did no one warn me, that when kids turn two, they suddenly become little adults. And outgrow everything ?
My little adult now demands a say in everything (yesterday he decided that he NEEDED fries, and that he loved French fries ), and has outgrown almost all his baby equipment. And by that I mean his car seat (meant for ages 0-3) his cabin sized travel stroller (meant for new born to 15kg) carrying him in the carrier is doable, but is so heavy.
On a separate note, I realised that we have a fairly well-travelled child at this point. I think we’ve brought him to 8/9 destinations, the most recent being the gold coast when my husband went to run the gold coast marathon.
I think the older he gets, it gets exponentially easier to travel with him and, it becomes very much obvious how much he takes away from these trips abroad and how much he enjoys it. He now loves airplanes and gets so upset Everytime he sees a plane he can’t get on. I know it sounds very privileged, but we work hard for the trips, and value every moment abroad.
On to the topic of travel strollers. We have been using the Joie Pact-Lite since the moment we started travelling with him (8months) and it has been a life saver. I think the only trip we didn’t bring the stroller was our last Hong Kong trip in feb, where we decided, given the itinerary (including hiking and lots of walking in cramps crowded HK) we would just use the carrier (worked out great, we rented a stroller in Disneyland).
J sleeps in the stroller like a boss (every naptime for around 2.5 hours) and knows that he can sit in the stroller when he gets tired of walking, and will quite willingly sit in it when we ask him to. It’s be a literal lifesaver because it means we can stay out all day and not worry about him.
The Joie Pact-Lite was great because it was cabin sized, which we made use of when he was younger and we’d use the stroller all the way to the gate. But now that he’s older and more into walking and insists on getting his own luggage to pull, we check the Pact-Lite in. It lay flat, for great naps, has a decent sized storage area underneath for us to stash stuff, was really easy to maneuver on flat, even ground (Rocky grounds were…. A no-go, a lesson learnt from Japan and korea) and it’s small signature meant it could stowed away in a car boot really easily. Or not take up too much space in a hotel room.
Sadly, he’s since outgrown it in the sense that he’s too long for it. His legs hang off when he naps, and his head hits the very top of the stroller. He has no complaints, but we decided that since we foresee using a travel stroller often for holidays, we’d see if we can find another that would accommodate a bigger child.
We found the Joie Tourist (newly released in 2019). It’s not cabin sized, meaning most airlines will not allow it in the overhead bins because of its height, but it is only 6kg which is still very light. And folds into a nice small stand. We just got it, and took it on a small push out at Changi Jewel the other day, and we were impressed at how much bigger it was, and how comfortable be looked in it. We’ll try and do a proper review once we bring it abroad with us once.
Gotta go watch the boy now. In a while crocodile.
On a totally random sidenote, I just finished reading Born to Run by Christopher McDougall. And I enjoyed, and was inspired by it, so much more then I expected.
So, I’m what I would consider a recreational runner. I used to run almost everyday before I had J. I think back then I was a lot more concerned about my speed, and probably ran about 5-6 10Ks a year ? With a few 5Ks interspersed. I don’t think I’ve ever been fast. But I was… Above average.
After having J, it took me a while (really like 1.5years) before I even started running again. And it’s been tough getting back into the groove of things. Between being lazier, more tired and basically less into running, it’s been tough trying to focus on running.
Now that I’ve changed jobs and I have access to a gym, I’ve been trying to run at least 3 times a week. And I’ve recently gone back to play a bit of netball. Which I really miss and enjoy playing.
But how does the book fit into things? I was surprisingly inspired by it. Largely by the understanding that humans were built to run. Not fast, but long. And the idea of just running light and easy, like a child. I was really struck by this. J loves to run. He runs with childish abandon. I brought him down with me for netball the other day. And he was just doing endless laps up and down the court. Barefoot. Fast. Not the least bit winded. Just thinking back in his form made me realise that kids have an inmate understanding of how to run that adults just lose over the course of time.
So during my run today, I tried some of the tips on the books. I ran easy, light, head held high, balls of the feet kicking back to my butt. And I don’t know if it was a placebo, or if the book is really onto something but I enjoyed it. I felt I could go longer, faster.
Most important ? I think i can love to run again. And I can’t wait to do it more.
Kthanksbye.
So today. J had the day off from childcare because they had some school planning day. So the husband and I took the day off, with the intent of bringing J out.
We ended up going to Polliwogs at Suntec. The place was decent.. obviously aging, but to any kid, still lotsa fun. I’m not here to review the place today. If you have any questions regarding the place you can always contact me directly.
But my pet peeve of the day. Kids that don’t behave. And see here’s the thing. K don’t expect a 4-7 year old to behave at an indoor playground. That’s impossible. I can’t even get a 2 year old to behave when both of us are actively telling him to.
But I feel that there has to be some line drawn. If the kids are there with parents / helpers who expect some respite from them. Fair enough. Then I think the onus should be on the operators to ensure that there’s at least some semblance of… Discipline.
So I say this because, while the place was divide into areas: One area for the toddlers (below 3), one ball playing area and one for big kids (above 3), nobody actually monitored this. This meant that the big kids were rushing into the toddler area to play, which was frankly a little dangerous, a few times almost hitting / stepping on the little ones. Thank goodness the toddlers almost always had adults with them. At the same time, the kids were taking the balls away from the ball area to other places and not bringing it back. Which left a measly amount of balls left for the little kids to play with. And throughout all this, there were operators just walking around, doing their own thing, moving things around etc and ignoring everything that was going on.
I don’t think it’s fair to expect them to police the play. And frankly impossible. But at the same time. Some of these things are quite fundamental. So, safe to say. I was slightly disappointed.
But obviously J didn’t find anything remiss. He loved it. Played for a solid 3 hours. And was so pooped after he was asleep by 7pm.
There are good days. And there are bad days. Yesterday was a great day filled with laughs and fun. Today was a hard day for everyone. School and work. Followed by tantrums and misunderstandings.
Mummy is sorry I can’t always be patient. That I have to lose my temper. But at the same time. I’m glad that you learn. That it’s not okay to always get your way. Life is simply not that like that. at the end of the day. A hug sorry. A kiss of love. Tmr will be a better day. Right ?
That moment where your toddler knows he’s in trouble with you. And decides to ignore you in favour of other people (read grandparents ) who will give him biscuits and play with him instead.
Sure. That works.
On a Crazy Adventure 